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How to Improve Yourself 

At present, our school is launching How to Improve Yourself campaign. ... 

My father was 44 and knew he wasn't going to make it to 45. He wrote me a letter and hoped that something in it would help me for the rest of my life.

Since the day I was 12 and first read his letter, some of his words have lived in my heart. One part always stands out. "Right now, you are pretending to be a time-killer. But I know that one day, you will do something great that will set you among the very best." Knowing that my dad believed in me gave me permission to believe in myself. "You will do something great." He didn't know what that would be, and neither did I, but at times in my life when I've felt proud of myself, I remember his words and wish he were here so I could ask, "Is this what you were talking about, Dad? Should I keep going?"

A long way from 12 now, I realize he would have been proud when I made any progress. Lately, though, I've come to believe he'd want me to move on to what will come next: to be proud of and believe in, somebody else. It's time to start writing my own letters to my children. As mothers, our children look to us with the same unanswered question we had. Our kids don't retreat because they're afraid to fail. They're only afraid of failing us. They don't worry about being disappointed. Their fear—as mine was until my father's letter—is of being a disappointment.

Give your children permission to succeed. They're waiting for you to believe in them. I always knew my parents loved me. But trust me: That belief will be more complete, that love will be more real, and their belief in themselves will be greater if you write the words on their hearts: "Don't worry; you'll do something great." Not having that blessing from their parents may be the only thing holding them back.

One of the greatest sources of unhappiness, in my experience，is the difficulty we have in accepting things as they are. 

When we see something we don't like, we wish it could be different.We cry out for something better.That may be human nature, or perhaps it's something ingrained(根深蒂固的)in our culture.The root of the unhappiness isn't necessarily that we want things to be different. However，it's that we decided we didn't like it in the first place.We've judged it as bad，rather than saying，"It's not bad or good，and it just is it."

In one of my books, I said"You should expect people to mess up and expect things to go differently than you planned"．Some readers said it's too sorrowful to expect things to go wrong. However, it's only negative if you see it as negative and judge it as bad.Instead，you could accept it as the way the world works and try to understand why that is.

This can be applied to whatever you do：how other people act at work，how politics works and how depressing the news media can be.Accept these things as they are，and try to understand why they're that way. It will save you a lot of sadness，because you'll no longer say，"Oh，I wish bad things didn't happen！"

Does it mean you can never change things? Not at all.But change things not because you can't accept things as they are，but because you enjoy the process of changing，learning and growing. 

Can we make this world a better place? You can say that you'll continue to try to do things to help others, to grow as a person，and to make a difference in this world.That's the correct path you choose to take，because you enjoy that path.Therefore，when you find yourself judging and wishing for difference，try a different approach：accept and understand.It might lead to some interesting results.